Top Ten Best TV Shows

So here is my "Top 10 Best Tv Show List." You will find that I have a pretty boring TV Life.

10. Really big Things: This is a relatively new show hosted by Matt Rogers. He travels the world looking for massive construction. He is a large meat head and likes to fit the part. He says lots of meat head things and gets excited about big metal things and fire and destruction and other things and stuff like that (haha). You can also see quite a lot of cool things. Ok, so you don't learn hardly anything, but it is a good show to watch after studying for 10 hours straight. You know, when you just want to sit like a vegetable and mindlessly get your mind of anything to do with words, numbers, ideas, and other "things of that nature" ("things of that nature" is a quote I picked up from the Governator).
9. The O'reilly Factor: I can feel the surge of people leaving my blog as I type this. Bill O'Reilly comes across a big-headed, pompous jerk. I hate to admit this in public... but... I like the guy. In my opinion, he is, by far, the most fair and balanced anchor on tv. I watch him for two reasons: 1. I like his ideas, and 2. I like watching him "bloviate" (anyone who watches the show will pick up what I'm putting down). Anyway, 1 and 3/11 thumbs up to Bill.
8. Build it Bigger: This show, hosted by Danny Forster, is slowly becoming one of my favorites. Danny travels around the world looking for large construction. He is a high energy geek who gets overly excited about little things--this is what makes the show. He is like watching an eighth grader pack his belongings to go on a fishing trip. Also, it is cool to see the massive construction and how they do it all.
7. Iron Chef America: Iron Chef America is an intense gourmet cooking competition. I was going to put this one last, but knew that people probably wouldn't read the rest of the list thinking that it was going to be too boring. If you don't like my shows then go watch your own TV (sorry, I take this sort of thing personal). Anyway, Iron Chef America, hosted by the interesting Alton Brown, is fun to watch. Personally, my favorite chef to watch is Bobby Flay. I know... I know... i'm not scoring points with the Gen-X'ers on this one.
6. Wow Wow Wubbzy: And you thought that I didn't watch television with my son. Every time Wow Wow Wubbzy comes on James starts laughing, smiling, and uncontrollably throwing his arms in the air (oh yeah, and drools in the process). Anyway, Wow Wow Wubbzy is a hit for 10 month olds and their parents.
5. Dog Whisperer: Cesar Millan is by far the coolest Mexican on TV. I really like watching the Dog Whisperer--it is amazing how quickly he can change the entire personality of dogs. You are probably already beginning to see that my top 10 list is much the same as that of the average middle-aged woman--Oh Well. Have you ever seen Cesar get bitten by a dog? I wonder how many times he has been bitten. I lost track at ummm... somewhere around 23. I am surprised he still has hands. Maybe he is part Mexican part machine or something--I wouldn't be surprised.
4. Survivor Man: Believe it or not, Survivorman is one of those survival shows--I know... hard to believe. It is hosted by the most savvy Canadian alive, Les Stroud. If I were making this top 10 list a year ago, Survivorman would have been #1, but the show this past season was pretty lame. He just didn't seem to do anything new or crazy--what is the point of doing a survival show if you don't do anything crazy? However, I have high hopes for the next season. If anyone comes to any understanding of how he stays so clean throughout his survival trips, fill me in.
3. Dirty Jobs: Mike Roe travels across the country finding the most disgustingly dirty jobs out there. The best part of the show is Mike and his witty humor. While watching the show I get the feeling that Mike is the sort of guy who never shuts up. Anyway, Dirty Jobs takes a strong 3rd.
2. Man vs. Wild: This is a survival show hosted by Bear Grylls. Bear has a cool accent, eats 3 day old dead zebras raw, climbs lots of things, and does stuff that would cause me to poop my pants. Anyway, this is an excellent show--you can learn lots about staying alive and stuff--which is nice... if you think about it.

And my #1 favorite show is...
1. Holmes on Homes: This has quickly become my favorite. There are a lot of crooked construction contractors out there. Mike Holmes has dedicated his life to helping people who have been ripped off by such contractors. He goes through houses messed up by contractors and redoes everything that was done wrong FOR FREE (oh, and did I mention that he makes made cash for doing so. Who would of thought: you can help people AND get rich in the process. SIGN ME UP!). I am convinced that this show applies to my spiritual life, but I can't quite make the connection--someone acting like they know what they are doing comes into the houses of uninformed people and messes everything up and then Mike has to come in and fix everything--Nope, still can't make the connection. Holmes is extremely smart and knows most construction trades very well. This show is by far the best show on TV at this point. If you disagree with me I will just build a wall around you so you can't get out--because that is something I know how to do because I watch Holmes on Homes. I have got to get me some of those overalls--This guy I once knew told me that wearing overalls actually changes your DNA. Anyway, he died from salmonella poisoning 3 months after filling me in. Hmmm...????

So what did you think of my incredibly boring Top 10 TV Shows list? Making this list was very therapeutic for me--now I know why my life leans on the "not too eventful" side of things. I trust that you noticed that there was nothing about Lost, CSI, House, or any of those other shows. I guess murder mysteries and car chases put me to sleep--haha. Actually, Kristal and I just don't like all the violence and cleavage that is scattered throughout most shows. Not saying that you are in sin if you watch those shows, just saying that you are of the devil. Haha. Anyway, I like my shows so leave them alone. If you think I am nonspiritual because I watch tv I have some advice for you: Get off the computer and go read your Bible. Haha, I should be a Christian comedian.